Kung ang Right to Grow means change, ang Right to Be Yourself ay karapatang manatili sa pagiging ikaw, o magbago ayon sa nais mo at hindi ng ibang tao.
Every person has the right to be himself,
the person he is,
the sum total of his feelings,
thoughts, affections, tastes, dislikes and perception.
Meron sa ‘tin childish. May emo. May rakista. May nerd, athletic, artistic, religious, pasaway, tahimik, maingay, basagulero at samu’t-saring personalidad. At ang bawat isa meron din kanya-kanyang pananaw, prinsipyo, adhikain.
Ang pagkakaiba ng bawat isa – at ang pagsasama ng dalawang taong magkaiba – ang kadalasang nagpapakulay ng mundo mo. To live with another person is to try to share the world he perceives and in so doing to permit your world to grow – and sometimes to give up your illusions – through love.
Kahit ano pa ang pananaw mo sa mundo, it is yours. More than that, it is you. You have the right to be you… to say “I am”.
Walang sinuman ang may karapatang baguhin ka, pero kung gusto mong magbago, walang sinuman ang pwedeng pumigil sa’yo. A relationship cannot continue to exist when one person demands that the other change in order to keep the relationship alive. A person doesn’t really change unless he wants to.
“You got to love me for what I am
For simply being me,
Don’t love me for what you intend
Or hope that I will be,
Cause if you’re only using me
To feed your fantasy
You’re really not in love
So let me go
I must be free”
-------------Carpenters, Love Me For What I Am
The song, kahit na sabihin ng iba na sobrang corny, basically sums the whole point. The picture of perfection is only on your mind, for all your expectations love can never be designed.
Monday, October 19, 2009
Right to be Trusted
Eto ang third right. Mejo late kasi may mga nangyari sa kin na wala sa schedule. n_n
You have the right to be trusted
until you give people reason to believe
you are not worthy of their trust.
Minsan, umaabot ng ilang taon para sa dalawang tao na pagtiwalaan ang isa’t-isa. At may mga tao naman na hindi na talaga nagtiwala, kahit sa kapareha nila.
Kung magtitiwala ka lang sa mga taong gumagawa ng ikakasaya mo, wala kang mapagkakatiwalaan.
Pag pinagkatiwalaan mo ang lahat, tanga ka.
Pag nagtiwala ka ng masyadong maaga, malamang takot ka lang ma-reject.
Pag nagtiwala ka ng masyadong mababaw, maaari kang maloko.
Pag nagtiwala ka ng masyadong huli, baka hindi mo na malaman ang totoong pag-ibig.
Karapatan mo na hindi pagdudahan ng kapareha mo ang mga sinasabi mo. Na hindi kinakailangang imbestigahan ka pa, ipagtanong sa mga kakilala kung totoo nga ang mga binitawan mong salita.
Trust is a living feeling.
It grows with a relationship.
It is fragile.
Very easily broken
And often irreparable.
-------------Dr. David Viscott, How To Live With Another Person
Hindi ibig sabihin ng pagtitiwala ay itatapon mo na lahat ng pag-iingat. Kailangan mo pa rin pangalagaan ang sarili mo.
May malaking chance na abusuhin ka ng taong pinagkakatiwalaan mo. At minsan, may mga dahilan para ka magduda. The possibility na ikaw ay maloloko ang nakakapagpatunay sa pagtitiwala. That in spite of possible reasons to doubt, you choose to believe, you risked trusting.
Trusting entails a lot of risk. And if you’re not ready to risk, you’re not ready to love.
To trust each other is to be vulnerable in the same way.
You have the right to be trusted
until you give people reason to believe
you are not worthy of their trust.
Minsan, umaabot ng ilang taon para sa dalawang tao na pagtiwalaan ang isa’t-isa. At may mga tao naman na hindi na talaga nagtiwala, kahit sa kapareha nila.
Kung magtitiwala ka lang sa mga taong gumagawa ng ikakasaya mo, wala kang mapagkakatiwalaan.
Pag pinagkatiwalaan mo ang lahat, tanga ka.
Pag nagtiwala ka ng masyadong maaga, malamang takot ka lang ma-reject.
Pag nagtiwala ka ng masyadong mababaw, maaari kang maloko.
Pag nagtiwala ka ng masyadong huli, baka hindi mo na malaman ang totoong pag-ibig.
Karapatan mo na hindi pagdudahan ng kapareha mo ang mga sinasabi mo. Na hindi kinakailangang imbestigahan ka pa, ipagtanong sa mga kakilala kung totoo nga ang mga binitawan mong salita.
Trust is a living feeling.
It grows with a relationship.
It is fragile.
Very easily broken
And often irreparable.
-------------Dr. David Viscott, How To Live With Another Person
Hindi ibig sabihin ng pagtitiwala ay itatapon mo na lahat ng pag-iingat. Kailangan mo pa rin pangalagaan ang sarili mo.
May malaking chance na abusuhin ka ng taong pinagkakatiwalaan mo. At minsan, may mga dahilan para ka magduda. The possibility na ikaw ay maloloko ang nakakapagpatunay sa pagtitiwala. That in spite of possible reasons to doubt, you choose to believe, you risked trusting.
Trusting entails a lot of risk. And if you’re not ready to risk, you’re not ready to love.
To trust each other is to be vulnerable in the same way.
The Right to be Respected
One way to be respected is by respecting others. Respect cannot exist unless it is mutual. At ang unang tao na dapat nating respetuhin ay ang sarili natin. If you don’t respect yourself, hindi possible sa’yo na respetuhin ang pag-ibig ng ibang tao para sa’yo.
Respect lays the foundation of commitment. Talagang dumadating ang punto na humihina ang apoy ng pagmamahal. At kung ang nakakasama mong kapareha ay hindi mo kayang respetuhin, paano ka tatagal? You might lose infatuation, but with respect, you can keep your admiration for the person you love.
Sa basic right na to kabilang ang karapatan mong seryohin ka ng kapareha mo. That you say what you mean, and you mean what you say. Pero hindi ibig sabihin nito na dapat lagi kang seryoso or nakaka-bored at walang kasiyahan..
Karapatan mong magsalita at pakinggan. Lahat ng opinion mo sa relationship ay dapat kasing importante ng opinion ng kapareha mo. Para mag work out ang isang relasyon, dapat pantay kayong dalawa. Kailangan pakinggan ang side mo, dahil kung hindi, kalahati lang ang alam sa katotohanan.
Kung isang tao lang sa relasyon ang sineseryoso at pinakikinggan, it is not a relationship but a performer and an audience.
Respect lays the foundation of commitment. Talagang dumadating ang punto na humihina ang apoy ng pagmamahal. At kung ang nakakasama mong kapareha ay hindi mo kayang respetuhin, paano ka tatagal? You might lose infatuation, but with respect, you can keep your admiration for the person you love.
Sa basic right na to kabilang ang karapatan mong seryohin ka ng kapareha mo. That you say what you mean, and you mean what you say. Pero hindi ibig sabihin nito na dapat lagi kang seryoso or nakaka-bored at walang kasiyahan..
Karapatan mong magsalita at pakinggan. Lahat ng opinion mo sa relationship ay dapat kasing importante ng opinion ng kapareha mo. Para mag work out ang isang relasyon, dapat pantay kayong dalawa. Kailangan pakinggan ang side mo, dahil kung hindi, kalahati lang ang alam sa katotohanan.
Kung isang tao lang sa relasyon ang sineseryoso at pinakikinggan, it is not a relationship but a performer and an audience.
The Party Animal
Nag-search ako sa wikipedia kung saan nagmula ang concept na party animal. pero walang kwenta ang result. Sa thefreedictionary.com sinabi na ang party animal ay isang tao na sobrang hilig magparty, at s/he goes to as many as possible.
Maraming party animal na proud. Makikita mo sa website nila that they "Live to Party" at "Work Hard and Party Harder". i'm not going to say its bad or its wrong. katulad nga ng sinabi ko sa taas, it will be just my personal biased preference.
You see, meron na akong isang daga (named - Mikki) who outlive two of his partners, isang myna bird (named BabyLoves) na lagi nag-che-cheer sa brother ko pag naglalaban kami sa videoke, isang askal na gray puppy (named BluEyes) na obviously kulay asul ang mata, 4 na nameless goldfishes na lumalangoy with a sharkfish and a janitorfish. (and R.I.P pla kay Fluffy and Fliffy, the two bunnies which one was helplessly devoured by a neighbor's dog, and which the other died out of grief).
our house is practically a zoo (not that i count myself as a monkey), and something tells me that adding a party-animal doesn't sound appealing.
Hindi ko gusto ng partner na uubos ng sahod sa isang party (na kahit scraps ng chichiria walang madadala para kay Mikki), napapaligiran ng taong bangag sa coccaine or ecstasy, at uuwi ng lasing, susuka at magkakalat, matutulog maghapon, at iritable pag-gising.
I admit i experience that (except the drug and smokes). I admit it is nice. Addictive.
Pero tulad ng isang pagkain, Partying is the icing on a cake. Matamis. Pero hindi nakakabusog. Mapapasayaw ka, mawawala sa sarili, sa ingay ng musika, but it deafened the silence of your Soul. Maraming kulay, liwanag, at mga mukhang maganda sa paningin, but it blinds you to the beauty of sunrise, or the smiles of the people who truly matters.
O siguro talagang probinxano lang ako at heart. Pero i still hold on to my preference. Ok lang ang gumigimik, pero ayoko sa gimikero. I already have lots of animals.
Who would need a high(er)-maintennance one?
n_n
Maraming party animal na proud. Makikita mo sa website nila that they "Live to Party" at "Work Hard and Party Harder". i'm not going to say its bad or its wrong. katulad nga ng sinabi ko sa taas, it will be just my personal biased preference.
You see, meron na akong isang daga (named - Mikki) who outlive two of his partners, isang myna bird (named BabyLoves) na lagi nag-che-cheer sa brother ko pag naglalaban kami sa videoke, isang askal na gray puppy (named BluEyes) na obviously kulay asul ang mata, 4 na nameless goldfishes na lumalangoy with a sharkfish and a janitorfish. (and R.I.P pla kay Fluffy and Fliffy, the two bunnies which one was helplessly devoured by a neighbor's dog, and which the other died out of grief).
our house is practically a zoo (not that i count myself as a monkey), and something tells me that adding a party-animal doesn't sound appealing.
Hindi ko gusto ng partner na uubos ng sahod sa isang party (na kahit scraps ng chichiria walang madadala para kay Mikki), napapaligiran ng taong bangag sa coccaine or ecstasy, at uuwi ng lasing, susuka at magkakalat, matutulog maghapon, at iritable pag-gising.
I admit i experience that (except the drug and smokes). I admit it is nice. Addictive.
Pero tulad ng isang pagkain, Partying is the icing on a cake. Matamis. Pero hindi nakakabusog. Mapapasayaw ka, mawawala sa sarili, sa ingay ng musika, but it deafened the silence of your Soul. Maraming kulay, liwanag, at mga mukhang maganda sa paningin, but it blinds you to the beauty of sunrise, or the smiles of the people who truly matters.
O siguro talagang probinxano lang ako at heart. Pero i still hold on to my preference. Ok lang ang gumigimik, pero ayoko sa gimikero. I already have lots of animals.
Who would need a high(er)-maintennance one?
n_n
Five Things I Learned From Not Dating
Five Things I Learned From Not Dating
by: Lt. Miko Legaspi, PN (Palaging Nagtatago)
Task Force Single
5. Maraming Productive Alternatives
Sa pamamagitan ng hindi pakikipagdate, marami ka palang pwedeng mapalang kapakipakinabang na bagay. Nakapaglunsad ako ng isang malaking project (June). Nakapagdesign (september) launched (october) at administered (to present) ng isang website. Nakapagcoordinate ng events (july homecoming, november 3 schools party, january fun run). Nakaattend ng mga occassions (2 lamay at 17 na kasal). Nakapaglibot (november boracay, february japan). nakapagbasa ng 20+ na books. naging president ng isang non-profit org (january to present). nakapagpanimula ng extension service sa 2 orphanage (february). napagbati ang mga naggiyerang bansa, nameet ang mga bagong presidente at napigilan ang global warming (imbento ko na lang yung 3 yun, hehehe).
the point is, lahat tayo ay may 24 hours a day. spending it on something means denying that same Time (and resources and energy) from something else.
4. Maging Matino.
Sa mga nakakakilala sa kin at mga nakakaalam ng “adventures” ko, grabe, anlaki ng pagbabago. Kung dati i have 2 shags a week (na kadalasan pa ay magkaibang tao), naka 4 shags lang ako (total 5 if you consider buko juice as shag) for the past 350+ days! imagine that!!! That is only 3% of my minimal annual quota. hahaha. Ganon ka-effective ang Strategic Plan ko kung pano umiwas. For my guide, visit this.
para sa mga nag-iisip na shag=date, i would argue there’s a big difference, but it merits a blog of its own, kaya hindi ko na ididiscuss on this entry.
3. There is A Stage!
Natutunan ko rin (actually, na-apply ko ang old-aged-lesson) about stages. sabi dito, may mga stages na hinahakbangan ang maturity. like baby stage, puberty, teenage, etc. pagnilampasan mo raw ang isang stage (halimbawa, teenager ka pero super concentrate ka sa trabaho), maari mong naising balikan ang stage na yun kahit hindi na appropriate sa edad mo.
isang example nito ang mga superjutanders na gimik pa rin ng gimik halos araw-araw. tapos sila pa ang mahilig makipag-away pag hindi sila bumebenta. i really think if they want to sell, they should sit on their rocking chairs at home and write novels. hehehe. mean!
in my case, i believe nakagraduate na ko sa Gimik mode. i realized the difference ng gumigimik sa gimikero. kaya nakakapagpadagdag ng pagiging good boy ko (or simpleng workaholic lang), hehehe.
2. Mataas Talaga ang Pride
Isa sa pinakamalaking motivation ko para matapos ang Zero Dating Goal ay ang pride ko. Walang naniniwala (except those na kilala na ko for more than 10 years) na kakayanin kong hindi makipagdate sa loob ng isang taon. Nyehehehe. Who’s laughing now (beaming with pride). n_n
They say Pride is a Sin. pero i don’t think so. Pag hindi ka nakipagbati sa kaaway mo dahil kasalanan nya, that’s pride. Pag hindi ka nakipag-ayos kahit kasalanan mo, that’s arrogance. Pag ngumiti ka kahit nasasaktan, showing grace despite of defeat, that is pride. Pride motivates you to defend your dignity and honor, to keep going kahit alam ng lahat na nahihirapan ka, and to protect yourself sa mga mananakit sau. that is Pride. just make sure you are not mistaking it from something else.
1. Kaya Kong Mag-Commit.
Finally, ito ang pinakamalaking lesson (actually, proof) that i can commit. May mga taong dumating while i’m on my goal. And some of them are really worthy. Yung isa nga, when he arrived, nasabi ko na “syet, ito na yata ang taong makakapagpabago sa Zero Dating Goal ko”. Check this
“There is no chance, no destiny, no fate
that can circumvent or hinder or control
the firm resolve of a determined soul”
————-Ella Wilcox, Miko’s Kollected Kuotes
Tiniis ko sya, sobra. Ngayon, may bf na sya. Wahahaha! Inggit ako. Pero ganon talaga. By knowing i can resist someone, means that i can do it again pag commited na ako tapos may mga bagong susulpot. My would-be partner will be secured in knowing hindi ako maagaw ng kahit sino. hehehe.
Ang kalaban ko na lang ay inertia. Parang i've been alone for so long i'm comfortable with it. T_T
Pero kailangan na, hehehe. Sino kaya ang idi-date ko?
n_n
by: Lt. Miko Legaspi, PN (Palaging Nagtatago)
Task Force Single
5. Maraming Productive Alternatives
Sa pamamagitan ng hindi pakikipagdate, marami ka palang pwedeng mapalang kapakipakinabang na bagay. Nakapaglunsad ako ng isang malaking project (June). Nakapagdesign (september) launched (october) at administered (to present) ng isang website. Nakapagcoordinate ng events (july homecoming, november 3 schools party, january fun run). Nakaattend ng mga occassions (2 lamay at 17 na kasal). Nakapaglibot (november boracay, february japan). nakapagbasa ng 20+ na books. naging president ng isang non-profit org (january to present). nakapagpanimula ng extension service sa 2 orphanage (february). napagbati ang mga naggiyerang bansa, nameet ang mga bagong presidente at napigilan ang global warming (imbento ko na lang yung 3 yun, hehehe).
the point is, lahat tayo ay may 24 hours a day. spending it on something means denying that same Time (and resources and energy) from something else.
4. Maging Matino.
Sa mga nakakakilala sa kin at mga nakakaalam ng “adventures” ko, grabe, anlaki ng pagbabago. Kung dati i have 2 shags a week (na kadalasan pa ay magkaibang tao), naka 4 shags lang ako (total 5 if you consider buko juice as shag) for the past 350+ days! imagine that!!! That is only 3% of my minimal annual quota. hahaha. Ganon ka-effective ang Strategic Plan ko kung pano umiwas. For my guide, visit this.
para sa mga nag-iisip na shag=date, i would argue there’s a big difference, but it merits a blog of its own, kaya hindi ko na ididiscuss on this entry.
3. There is A Stage!
Natutunan ko rin (actually, na-apply ko ang old-aged-lesson) about stages. sabi dito, may mga stages na hinahakbangan ang maturity. like baby stage, puberty, teenage, etc. pagnilampasan mo raw ang isang stage (halimbawa, teenager ka pero super concentrate ka sa trabaho), maari mong naising balikan ang stage na yun kahit hindi na appropriate sa edad mo.
isang example nito ang mga superjutanders na gimik pa rin ng gimik halos araw-araw. tapos sila pa ang mahilig makipag-away pag hindi sila bumebenta. i really think if they want to sell, they should sit on their rocking chairs at home and write novels. hehehe. mean!
in my case, i believe nakagraduate na ko sa Gimik mode. i realized the difference ng gumigimik sa gimikero. kaya nakakapagpadagdag ng pagiging good boy ko (or simpleng workaholic lang), hehehe.
2. Mataas Talaga ang Pride
Isa sa pinakamalaking motivation ko para matapos ang Zero Dating Goal ay ang pride ko. Walang naniniwala (except those na kilala na ko for more than 10 years) na kakayanin kong hindi makipagdate sa loob ng isang taon. Nyehehehe. Who’s laughing now (beaming with pride). n_n
They say Pride is a Sin. pero i don’t think so. Pag hindi ka nakipagbati sa kaaway mo dahil kasalanan nya, that’s pride. Pag hindi ka nakipag-ayos kahit kasalanan mo, that’s arrogance. Pag ngumiti ka kahit nasasaktan, showing grace despite of defeat, that is pride. Pride motivates you to defend your dignity and honor, to keep going kahit alam ng lahat na nahihirapan ka, and to protect yourself sa mga mananakit sau. that is Pride. just make sure you are not mistaking it from something else.
1. Kaya Kong Mag-Commit.
Finally, ito ang pinakamalaking lesson (actually, proof) that i can commit. May mga taong dumating while i’m on my goal. And some of them are really worthy. Yung isa nga, when he arrived, nasabi ko na “syet, ito na yata ang taong makakapagpabago sa Zero Dating Goal ko”. Check this
“There is no chance, no destiny, no fate
that can circumvent or hinder or control
the firm resolve of a determined soul”
————-Ella Wilcox, Miko’s Kollected Kuotes
Tiniis ko sya, sobra. Ngayon, may bf na sya. Wahahaha! Inggit ako. Pero ganon talaga. By knowing i can resist someone, means that i can do it again pag commited na ako tapos may mga bagong susulpot. My would-be partner will be secured in knowing hindi ako maagaw ng kahit sino. hehehe.
Ang kalaban ko na lang ay inertia. Parang i've been alone for so long i'm comfortable with it. T_T
Pero kailangan na, hehehe. Sino kaya ang idi-date ko?
n_n
Life unwinding.,
Many people will walk in and out of your life,But only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.
To handle yourself, use your head;To handle others, use your heart.
Anger is only one letter short of danger.
If someone betrays you once, it is his fault;If he betrays you twice, it is your fault.
Great minds discuss ideas;Average minds discuss events;Small minds discuss people.
Learn from the mistakes of others.You can’t live long enough to make them all yourself.
Friends, you and me….You brought another friend….And then there were 3….We started our group….Our circle of friends….And like that circle….There is no beginning or end….
Yesterday is history.Tomorrow is mystery.Today is a gift.
To handle yourself, use your head;To handle others, use your heart.
Anger is only one letter short of danger.
If someone betrays you once, it is his fault;If he betrays you twice, it is your fault.
Great minds discuss ideas;Average minds discuss events;Small minds discuss people.
Learn from the mistakes of others.You can’t live long enough to make them all yourself.
Friends, you and me….You brought another friend….And then there were 3….We started our group….Our circle of friends….And like that circle….There is no beginning or end….
Yesterday is history.Tomorrow is mystery.Today is a gift.
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